What does it take to create and maintain a decent swinger party venue? The criteria vary as much as does the clientele. Even with the varying tastes of all who attend these parties and clubs there is several basic things that can make or break a new club from becoming prosperous. Having attended quite a few parties / clubs in the past we have come up with this simplified list of what to look for in a swinger venue.


The first in our list is “Who is in attendance?” because it is people who make parties not the facilities. Probably the biggest reason a swinger party flops no matter where it is being held is its inability to get its guests to participate. Sure enough of being able to draw a decent crowd for your first party, you will find that a good number aren’t interested in actual swinging. These numbers consist of the curious onlookers, and voyeurs usually led by the male half in a vain attempt to get their partner to swing or participate in his fantasy of some nature. Unfortunately it only takes a small amount of these types plus a few shy but otherwise real “new” couples to bring about a slow arduous death to your otherwise full venue. It’s hard to recover a party once the mood has been set afoul. Even the most seasoned of swingers can have their mood affected by this and your party numbers will start to dwindle quickly and all too early.
Next in our list is “How many are in attendance?” Although quite a few swinger parties take place with small numbers and are successful. The larger amount of people you have the more likely your party will have the right atmosphere, variety, and chemistry to be memorable in attendance. A small venue such as a house party can succeed with a small attendance where as a larger club like setting will resound with the sound of crickets as your meager amount of clientele parade out the door in boredom.
Another important requirement in making your party or club work is “A Balance of sexes”. The need for equal male to female ratio is usually paramount to success. In a larger party a single male may go un-noticed rather easily but in a smaller venue with small attendance they usually stick out like a sore thumb and can be a cause of disharmony for the few couples you have in attendance. Single females as we all know are “always” welcome to be around, although they are the unicorns of the lifestyle and rarely found at parties.
“Similar Values” being shared by your guests is another way to help your party succeed. Although swinging appears to be about the purely physical aspect it is usually shared by couples with similar value systems in place. Swinger’s do socialize prior to “hooking up” and usually at great length before deciding to move on to sex. Introductions are made and values are discussed either consciously or unconsciously and go a long way in determining if a sexual relationship will happen. It is therefore important to try and invite guests that share some of the same values and interests to your parties if you want to succeed. One party we used to attend interviewed perspective guests to see how they would fit the proverbial mold of their party. This has nothing to do with looks mind you it is personality that wins you entrance.
Although age is but a number in any relationship and attraction doesn’t usually rely on age much we find “A good balance of age groups” to be another key factor in planning and maintaining a decent party. People are usually attracted to other people who are generally in their age group, although this may vary a little with females in attendance and select others. Women tend to like older partners than men but again this may vary on a person to person basis. A party where age groups differ enormously and some guests will be unable to find anyone compatible with their age limits is highly unlikely to succeed.
So the question comes forth “How do we find a swinger party that we will have the most success at? Well there lies the problem it is impossible to predict which parties are going to have the right mix to make it work. The answer is to attend as many as possible. Compare them for their pros and cons. Accept the fact that some will be better than others and what may not be right for you may be right for someone else. Join online groups like the ones on Hedonist Lifestylez and ask others questions about clubs who have attended. When you ask make sure you only take the facts like “how many were there” Into consideration and then attend to form your own opinion. Just because one couple had a bad experience doesn’t make a club bad but when you do hear a high ratio of bad reviews it usually is true and that club or party should be avoided. We are actually in process of starting a club and party rating system for Hedonist Lifestylez and will be implementing it soon to help out swingers in finding the right venue for their activities.
As with any lists of observations on clubs or parties this one is not one hundred percent true at all times. Some parties and clubs are the exception to the rule although they are few in number. These parties succeed regardless of the above list of successful criteria. So like we said research before you attend and form your own opinions some of these venues can surprise you in either a good or bad way.

We just got back from Desire, our third trip and possibly the best one yet! Every year, the service and staff get even better if that’s at all possible.

We arrived late morning on Friday afternoon into the air conditioned lobby of paradise, the cool towel and glass of champagne were perfect considering the hot weather outside. Check in was quick and efficient, and we were taken right to our room. We quickly unpacked while enjoying a cold beer from the stocked refrigerator, a nice amenity for sure, especially since it was restocked daily with beer, soda and bottled water. Once unpacked, we hit the pool area for a lunch and took in the sights and sounds of paradise… freshly prepared food, music, the sound of the ocean only 50 feet from where we ate, and most importantly, naked bodies everywhere! Memo, our server, remembered us from our previous trips and after greeting us, brought us our drinks. The nice thing about a smaller resort like Desire is that he remembered, even after a year, what were would be drinking. Memo was not the exception, either, the majority of the staff at Desire have been there for years and they actually remember most of their repeat guests as well as feel the first time guests feel right at home.

After lunch, it was right into the pool to cool off, but that didn’t mean we were without drinks. The usual drink server Sylvia was out on maternity leave (she actually remembered our drink order every year despite serving thousands per day!), but her replacement was just as efficient and personable. We floated for several hours, just relaxing, and noticing that our drinks never got below ¼ full before receiving a fresh one. Late in the afternoon, we exited the pool and took the short walk to the crystal blue Caribbean Sea, just steps away. We splashed around for another hour, feeling the cooler salt water rush over our weary bodies.

We retired to our room, had some play time, showered and hit the steak buffet for dinner. We spent the rest of the evening meeting couples, many of whom were sad that they would be headed home the next day, we too would be in that situation in a week but that was still a long way away for us. For now, we kicked back and enjoyed our first night in paradise!

Saturday morning was exciting; we were filled with anticipation of other couples from our group who were arriving that day. After an early delicious breakfast buffet consisting of a freshly prepared omelet, bacon, tropical fruits, and a smoothie, we ended up relaxing on the beach on one of the many beach beds. Armed with fully charged iPods and a pair of new books, along with drink delivery right to the bed, we realized we might never really have to leave. The rest of the day was spent alternating from the bed to the ocean, while meeting new couples, some from our group and some not.

This was the routine that we fell into; usually an early morning beach bed, but sometimes spending the day at the more active pool. Delicious breakfast, lunch outdoors by the pool, and a nice dinner, all surrounded by great couples in paradise.

The dinners were always delicious, with the luxurious Il Piacere being our favorite. Suki Asian was also delicious; with the sushi being some of the better we have tried. The dinner highlight, however, was the private romantic candlelit dinner that we had on the beachfront gazebo. Our waiter, Marco, was devoted to our every need and took our order from the Il Piacere menu. Although there was an additional fee for this, I was surprised at how inexpensive it was - $25.

The nighttime activities were a blast, and the couples that took part in the theme nights had the best time. We won costume night (Pirate and Brazen Wench), took part in ‘Retro night’, had a blast with Tropical Night, but most enjoyed Eyes Wide Shut night as we both dressed in Cloaks and Masks (incidentally, if you haven’t seen the movie, it’s a great swingers movie and makes for a great theme night).

The highlight of the week was the trip on the private Desire Yacht. This Yacht is for use by ‘owners’, those that have bought timeshare through Desire. Its moored in Cancun at ‘Temptations’ Desires sister resort (although more vanilla, still topless). We were lucky enough to meet two great couples, one of which was an owner. They were kind enough to invite us to spend the morning with them; the 6 of us set out early. We had a great breakfast at Temptations then were on the boat by 8am. The ladies were topless in the harbor, and we were allowed to get naked once we left Cancun harbor. The captain showed us around the harbor for the first 45 minutes while the first mate served us complementary drinks, and sure enough, once we hit the open water, we were all naked and enjoying the breeze. Soon enough, we were all having fun on the front deck enjoying some early morning playing. The captain dropped us off about 200 yards from an island, with the most crystal blue water we had ever seen. The water was only about 5 feet deep and the entire floor of the ocean was soft sand. We played in the water for about an hour, enjoying an endless supply of cold drinks. Finally, on our way back, we played some more and enjoyed the warm sun and cool breeze as we pulled back into Cancun.

These two couples became very good friends, as we spend a lot of time enjoying their company, including several nights in the large roof top hot tub which easily held 40 people and had a great swim up bar. We also enjoyed a great evening of shopping and dinner in nearby Playa del Carmen.

Sadly, our stay in paradise ended way too soon, as we said goodbye to our new friends we ended up with a renewed excitement for our next trip. Join us… January 23-30 www.NewEnglandFlingz.net

Mark & Kathi

Swinging was once only found in people’s homes behind closed doors with the shades drawn. Now with the advent of more recent media publicity (i.e. Swing Town) you can find it just about anywhere. Society hasn’t changed to accept the lifestyle anymore than it did previously but swingers in general have become more outgoing and brazenly travel abroad in search of new adventures. Lifestyle Travel has now become the popular way for swingers to enjoy their relationship with their loved one and has expanded their reach for new play partners. The idea of a vacation where a couple or single is likely to meet and have fun with other like-minded adults is vastly growing as is the number of “Swingers” in general.
Swinger groups and clubs have sprouted out of just about every major U.S. city and worldwide for that matter. Several travel destinations such as Mexico and Jamaica have resorts catering to the swinger population at large. Places like Hedonism resorts and Desire to name just a couple are very popular and they host groups during each month all year long. Also growing in popularity are Lifestyle cruises and hotel get-a ways where couples and singles alike can get naked and enjoy another couple or single just as easily as lay around and sun tan.
These places cater to all sexual orientations so be you straight or bi you are welcome and unknowingly have a “friend” or two staying in a room next door or down the hall. . The activity staff is always thinking of new ways to help people meet and mingle. Games of nude volleyball and sexy lingerie parties abound at lifestyle resorts. Once you have made your new friends there is so much fun to be had whether it be hanging at the Jacuzzi, dancing in the night club, or just taking it back to the room for a mid-day romp.
We have found it easier to keep in touch with friends we have made abroad by having business cards made before our trip with our names, state, country, and email address on them. Keeping a log book of new friends can also be beneficial especially if you want to meet them again at the resort or cruise a future trip. Listing names, where you met and their contact information will help you remember who they are for years to come.
There are several ways to book lifestyle travel, but the safest way is to book with a reputable agent or group who specialize in lifestyle destinations that interest you. The benefits of booking with a lifestyle specialist agent or a group are: you save money, next they know the destination well and can recommend the best times to go, and lastly they are usually in the lifestyle themselves and understand what type of vacation you are looking for. There are several agents and groups we would recommend other than ourselves. We say this only because we have either dealt with them personally or have friends who have nothing but good things to say about their experiences with them. The agencies we would suggest other than ours are Shoes Only Travel, Castaways Travel and SDC Travel, each have lots of experience with lifestyle travel. As for groups to travel with they are as plentiful as peoples range of tastes. Two groups we would recommend other than our own are Fluffernutters and New England Flingz, both of which come highly recommended.
The aspect of lifestyle travel is an appealing diversion for today’s swingers. With the abundant choices of destinations to visit and groups who they can travel with it can become almost overwhelming. We can say without a doubt it is something we will do over and over again. We loved lifestyle travel so much we started our own travel agency and groups. We hope to see you our readers some day at one of the many resorts whether you travel through us or others we love meeting new friends from all over the world. Until then swing safely, and most importantly have lots of sexy fun.

We felt it necessary to write a piece about lifestyle party events and what you should expect based on the countless emails from Hedoonline.com visitors, who've expressed interest attending and those who have attended these parties for some time now.
Off premise party promoters, work very hard to produce unique experiences for you-the lifestyle patron. Some cater to those who are new to the lifestyle, and some cater to a more “exclusive bunch”. Who are the “exclusive bunch” you ask?
The “exclusive bunch”, are specially chosen people who exude sexiness and are very uninhibited while attending lifestyle events. They have NO problem introducing themselves regardless of physical attraction. The exclusive bunch realize they've been provided a playground to explore with other couples and single females, and fully take advantage of every second they are there. They don't mind paying a higher premium to attend because they know only people who party like them are going to be in attendance-which only makes for a successful night of hedonistic fun. Hedoonline lets you know this by our ratings (4 and 5 stars). A party being officially Hedoonline certified means that if you were fortunate enough to be invited by a Hedoonline certified party promoter, you can expect to fully experience (within limits), all the things lifestyle events were made for. You will find only the sexiest, friendliest, and like-minded partygoers in attendance.
Though most promoters create themed events to enhance the party experience-at Hedoonline certified events—the people ARE the party.
To us here at Hedoonline.com it makes no difference whether you attend a certified event or not- a party is a party and assuming you've “let your hair down” a bit, just by showing up to the party, you should always think of being “FIRST”.
Be the first to introduce yourselves. Let's stop here for a sec. You know what's funny about this? Most people who support these parties see the same people in attendance over time and have never even said “hello”. They pretend not to notice each other, but continue to run into each other. Wow! This is part of the problem. Stop viewing everyone you see as potential playmates. They are just people—like you. Say ‘Hello” and move on. Hell, they maybe a good real estate agent or something, who knows?
Be first to hit the dance floor! Why wait? Show that you can be the life of the party. Everyone there-is there for the same reason. So you won't look foolish. Unless you have NO rhythm at all! Just have fun, damnit! LoL.
These parties are what you, the “lifestylee” make them. I don't care what the theme is: White Party, Halloween, Fishnet night, Sexy Heels…whatever. If all you do is stand around being apprehensive and judgmental -you would have gotten all dressed up for nothing…and paid top dollar to do so.
So go out and participate. Be first. Be the life of the party.
Be well. Be you.
Lola and Devon.
Our friends Lola & Devon are the owners of:
HedoOnline.com